I watched a video this morning on YouTube by two youtube favourites, Patricia Bright and Shirley B Eniang titled “Things I would tell my teenage self”. It got me thinking about the things I would tell my teenage self and some things I would tell myself now. So here goes.
THINGS I WOULD TELL MY TEENAGE SELF
*Make more of an effort!*
If it wasn’t languages (except Yoruba. I was so happy I didn’t have to do it from my fourth year) and maybe a few other subjects then I really wasn’t interested. The worst was Government and Politics. I could have done well in that subject but for some reason I didn’t gel with it.
I really hated Biology and Maths. The way I had to hustle to get a C in my final Maths exams was not funny. I looked at my results recently and how I got a B in biology, I don’t know! Actually, it was the teachers. They worked us really hard up till the exam.
*Going to Nigeria will be fine. You’ll like it.*
I was in a state of denial when I was told that I was going to Nigeria for Boarding School. My parents wanted me to know my country so I accepted. I cried all the way to the airport, I cried on the plane, I cried when I got to Nigeria, I cried when they eventually dropped me off at boarding school and I cried days after.
I loved secondary school (the senior years more) and I guess my parents wanting me to know my country worked because I came back for law school and I am moving back.
*You don’t need to be friends with everyone. Having a small group of close friends is better*
I looked at other people who had a lot of friends and I used to admire them. I was happy with the few friends I had, don’t get me wrong. I just felt like it would have been nicer to be friends with more people. Now I know that having a small group of loyal friends is better than having a lot of fair weather friends. I would tell myself that I’ll end up making wonderful friends during and after uni.
*No one apart from you really cares about what you’re wearing and people who do don’t have anything better to do*
I wasn’t bothered much with my appearance but it was annoying that the tailor would measure me and my school uniform and house wear would always end up larger than me as if they had measured someone else. I became best friends with needle and thread. I had to reduce the clothes somehow.
My weight fluctuated. I would go home and get fattened up by my parents and then I would lose weight in school. Only one time did I gain a lot of weight and I didn’t realise until just before I was to go back to school. When I got back it felt like people were laughing at me.
So NB, you don’t need to worry that your clothes are so big. It doesn’t matter. Your size doesn’t matter either.
I didn’t want to hear about guys at all in secondary school. Some were interested in me but I didn’t like them. I was interested in some but they weren’t interested in me. What I would tell myself is, you were right not to be bothered.
My relationship with my parents was great and always has been. I did tell my mum that I wasn’t going to be a terrible teenager and I wasn’t but that didn’t mean I didn’t have my moments. I was closer to my mum than my dad until she died. I would tell myself that my dad is more approachable than I think and that I will joke around with him a lot more in future.
I can only think of two. I’m sure I have more. Who wouldn’t?
1. Wasting my time mooning over one person which was embarrassingly obvious to everyone!
2. It’s not really a regret but I did not like A Levels. 2 years went by and they didn’t go by quickly unfortunately.
THE THINGS I WOULD TELL MYSELF NOW
1. Try not to be so much of a people pleaser. You tend to put others first even when you’re inconvenienced.
2. There are some people you can’t take seriously so don’t bother.
3. During the early stages of getting to know people, if you’re making excuses then there’s no point bothering.
4. Don’t give a flying monkeys what people think. Your opinion is the one that matters.
5. You don’t have to apologise for being yourself.
6. Don’t compare yourself to others.
7. Be more confident within yourself.
And that is all!
Does anyone else have things to tell their teenage selves?